Dear Friend and Colleague

Dear Friend and Colleague,

We addressed your initial comments and questions quickly, with all due respect for your professionalism, uncomplaining, with equanimity and poise. We even ignored the thinly-veiled digs in your correspondence, all of which was carefully cc.’d to our mutual client.

And now you come to us with your second list of criticisms, with the intent, no doubt, of turning your review into an iterative process.

Please be assured that we do not intend to make any additional changes, that we believe that our research was thorough and our analysis and conclusions are reasonable and well supported.

So as you draft your report to our mutual client and prepare to toss us under the proverbial bus, I respectfully request that you take great care to detail all of the shortcomings of our work product. By all means, make your displeasure known. Emphasize our lack of professionalism and skill with bolded, italicized and underlined phrases. Maybe even use  all three. Perhaps a change in text color or ALL CAPS will do the trick. Or an unhappy face emoticon. Let your imagination run wild.

Regardless of the method you choose, it is my sincerest desire that you be clear.

Clear because without careful documentation, posterity would not believe that such a petty, small-minded and self-righteous man ever walked the earth.

Posterity might think I made up the whole thing.

Thank you, and please do not call if you have any questions.

Sincerely,

The Property Prophet

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